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"So obviously she goes outside to speak with him and I'm just left sitting there contemplating just leaving. My mom is calling.' Rolled him off of me, grabbed my stuff, and got dressed while walking out of his house. I turned, halfway down the driveway, still pulling a shirt on over my head. We fit perfectly together, even in the heavens.' "Even in the heavens, guys." - "I didn't know what to do, so I laughed awkwardly." "I was going on my first date with someone I had met online.I got a look out him through the window and he's an absolute mess. We had been talking a bit for about two weeks before we met.Why do people love to tell you their bad online dating stories?

You try to be helpful and innocently mention online dating as an option. ” Then it comes: “I went on a date with some guy who was at least 10 pounds heavier than he appeared on his profile,” she exclaims. There are the “Profile Misrepresentation” tales: She was shorter. These usually involve stories of failures of communication, like making your date wait 20 minutes in the cold because you got stuck in traffic on the way and couldn’t call because your cell phone died. ” or “She asked me to split the bill for two iced teas at Denny’s!

But before you can protect your drink from the spray of poison emanating from her mouth, she starts: “Oh, I would never do that again! ” Instead of excusing yourself to play Candy Crush on your phone, you let curiosity get the best of you. Or she dangles, “I went on a date with a guy with such disgusting table manners that I almost had to get up from the table and leave! Or you’re asked to go on an inappropriate date like a BBQ cookoff when you’re a vegetarian. ”) Or your date brought along his mom – although that could actually be an entertaining story!

I thought he wrote that to everyone, but after weeks of emails and phone calls, I finally agreed to meet him.

My stomach flip-flopped when I walked into that café and saw him holding a bouquet of yellow tulips.

To try and give you a idea of how bad I'm talking, like Joe Swanson-level crying ... "Then she comes back nearly in tears saying how she feels just terrible that she is the reason why he feels so bad. In reality, each one of those keystrokes was a simple tapping of a small piece of plastic, but, in my head, it sounded like a metal bank vault door was repeatedly slamming shut. We went to dinner on our date, he wasn't super talkative and it was mildly awkward.

I try to ask her if she is OK and comfort her, but she just says she's fine and we end up just finishing our drinks and calling it a night so I walk her down to the taxi rank and give her a hug and see her off." - "I couldn't believe that she'd react so rudely to something and then try to act as if it didn't happen." "I decided to meet up for coffee with a girl that I had been talking to online. "She pressed a few more buttons on the phone, presumably sending this text message to her total BFF. Then when he was dropping me off, I gave him a hug good night and he takes this opportunity to whisper in my ear, 'I love you.' I didn't know what to do, so I laughed awkwardly, assuming he was joking.

Then there was the case of the woman who asked her date to a flea market, made an excuse to use the restroom and promptly disappeared.

Although most bad online dating stories aren’t that awful, they do serve as a form of commiseration and a reminder that we’re not the only ones who ever got stood up or met someone who was vastly different than the person they appeared to be in their profile.

"When I said that I went to technical school and then straight into the workforce she looked at me as if she'd never heard of such a thing. college ...' I then saw the left thumb hold the shift key as she deliberately pressed the exclamation point key once ... I couldn't believe that she'd react so rudely to something and then try to act as if it didn't happen. After dinner they decided they were going to walk around the city.

Apparently, I didn't pass all of her minimum requirements to be considered human. Perhaps she still believed that, like a child playing hide and seek, if you covered your eyes you would disappear. ' I stood up and took my trash to the trash can and she followed me out the door. I don't have a drivers license.' "Now, I am normally not a rude person. She says she wants to drop into this shoe store real quick.

” “THAT was enough to make you give up online dating? Finally, we have the cringe-inducing “Bad Behavior” stories.